This is the season when God wants to bring you full circle, to end the cycle you are in and move you into a new season. This is the time to look at the failures that have taken place and realise anew that failures are not fatal flaws.
Sometimes when we have failed there comes a sense of shame that goes deep into our emotions. We feel we are fatally flawed: fear becomes our task-master. To compensate for this fear and shame we either withdraw or hide ourselves or make ourselves invisible. This can sometimes show up when we are in situations and are overlooked, ignored or simply passed by and someone else gets the attention. It’s like being in a restaurant and you see other guests who came in after you getting attention and served at the table next to you and the waiter says, ‘Sorry I didn’t see you!’ As I said this isn’t always the case, but when it happens regularly we can think ‘what’s up with me – can’t they see me?’ This may be the result of fear and the shame of our believing we are fatally flawed.
The other over-compensation is we become attention seekers, ‘look at me! I’m doing great!’ Driven to be noticed from the things we do for other people, serving becomes a watchword and we move into a works-mentality; we are unable to receive love for who we are because we feel un-loveable. It’s the result of our sense of feeling fatally flawed due to failure.
All of us have things in our past that we are afraid to bring into the light: the unacceptable part of our lives, the shame factor. This was true in the life of Esther, yet she took a risk; she came out of hiding her true self-identity and turned the cycle of defeat into victory, overcoming her oppressor and ultimately her life stealer.
While I write I am seeing the waves coming in and hearing their roar as they break upon the shore here in Bloubergstrand, South Africa. I am reminded of the relentless pursuit of God’s love and grace, new every morning. May this be your new morning when He turns your mourning into dancing, when you shake off the grave clothes of feeling fatally flawed and put on garments of praise: a new song of the God who sees you, still pursues you and covers all your imperfections.
As we enter this new season I pray that the old cycle of failure with all its shame and fear are not only broken but removed from your life. The Bible looks at this time as the month of Adar; it’s the last month of the priestly calendar for Israel. They had come full circle in the celebration of the feasts, the last one being the feast of Purim, found in the book of Esther.
Esther 9:19 ‘Therefore the Jews of the villages, who live in the rural towns, hold the fourteenth day of the month of Adar as a day for gladness and feasting, as a holiday, and as a day on which they send gifts of food to one another.’
Esther 9:21 ‘Mordecai wrote, obliging them to keep the fourteenth day of the month Adar and also the fifteenth day of the same, year by year.’
Now completely free from their life stealers, they could look with expectancy and hope as they prepared to enter the new year of celebration at Passover. This is how the Lord Jesus wants us to prepare ourselves for the coming seasons of celebration and enter a year of praise – living out our true identity, covered by Him and connected to Him.
Blessings upon your new covering and your new connection.